AssCo's Favorite Waiter Blog*

Here at AssCo we have a sacred duty to bring our readers all the ass-related news that's fit to blog. So it is with great joy that we bring you word of Ass Shot, the mezmerizing blog of the ass of the half-naked waiter at new fabulously sleazy gay bar mr.Black. Every Friday night, the dance floor fills with models, drunk gays, and celebrities (for instance, Alan Cumming, at left) who want to pose with the waiter's ass, and the evidence is all here. It's like Lastnightsparty, starring one ass.

Because we go the extra mile for you, we visited Mr. Black (after hearing about the ass on Gawker) and have examined the ass in person, and we can vouch that it is cute. If you are more into beefy types, check out the bartenders-all rumored to be porn stars.

*Outside of our professional capacity here at Assco, we are big fans of Waiterrant as well, but the ass:word ratio on that blog does not meet AssCo's stringent requirements.

AssCo Movie Night!

Way back in 1975, one of my favorite directors, Catherine Breillat, wrote the screenplay for Catherine et Cie (Catherine & Co.) about a prostitute (played by Miss Jane Birkin) who decides to incorporate. I haven't seen it (if Assco had an amazon wishlist, this would be on it) but according to the NY Times review:

Catherine is an English girl, played by Jane Birkin, who comes to Paris with a vague offer of a job. The job gets vaguer and she has to find a way to sleep and eat. Her first device has some ingenuity: she sleeps, literally, with a succession of rich men. The literally lies in her ability to get them talking about their businesses with such enthusiasm and at such length that ardor is virtually forgotten.

When this gimmick runs out, she allows herself to be kept, in more traditional French-farce fashion, by four men. She treats them as investors rather than clients, however, and allows herself to be kept as a kind of Common Market effort in venture capitalism. It all pays off handsomely, and love, independence and prosperity are more or less equally served in the end.

And according to the Celebrity Nudity Database (who knew??): Ms. Birkin does quite a bit of nude scenes in this movie. She has very small tits,but very attractive tits and a great ass. (Thanks, CNdb!)

***
Interesting fact about Miss Jane Birkin: it's her at age 21 making those naughty sounds with Brigitte Bardot on (her future husband) Serge Gainsbourg's "Je T'Aime...Moi Non Plus," originally on the 1969 album "Jane Birkin and Serge Gainsbourg," and later covered by the Pet Shop Boys, Cat Power, and Dzihan & Kamien.

Ass me no questions, I’ll tell you no thighs.

Long time ass-grabber, first time ass-blogger.

I can’t tell you how glad I am that I decided to join Ass Co. (health benefits!) I was offered a job for more money over at Balls Ltd., but this just feels like home. The training period was amazing, I am now a certified aesthetician in NY State, and I’m on my way to being promoted to Assistant Treasurer. Assistant Ass Treasurer.

For my first post, I wanted to pose a question that might generate some discussion. I ass you this: why is it that you only seem get ass when you aren’t actively pursuing it? It seems to me like you can’t search out ass, that ass has to come and find you.

Also, why did I have to wait 25 years to hear the term: “more ass then a toilet seat,” that’s friggin’ hilarious!

First Post Ever - Best Post Ever!

Hey kids,

So, I am officially one of the employees of ASS CO., but I guess you could say I've been out on maternity leave... But what a way to come back - 30 pounds lighter and with these AMAZING photos! ASSTASTIC! Enjoy...

Now, I'd just like to say that I got these photos in an email that said, "What you see below are not see-thru skirts. They are actually prints on the skirts to make it look as if the panties are visible and these are the current rage in Japan. They'll be the rage here in the USA soon." Initially I thought maybe, because you know those Harujuku Girls are a little nuts, but then it dawned on me that if a woman was going to spray paint an ass on her ass, she wouldn't even dream of having that ass have a wedgie - as in the third photo down, nor would she work in a magazine/candy store and wear an apron ten sizes too big that makes her look like a grandma as in the second to last photo above. So clearly these photos are "tricks," as they say. Oh you crazy photoshop jokester! Objectifiying Asian women! That is so original! I have to say, though, I do think the second photo down is not only hot due to the thong-th-thong-thong-thong, but it shows a lot of artistic quality as well. (And I love the way her skirt matches that bit of sweatshirt peeking out of her collar!)

Now, I feel 99.9% sure that these photos aren't real - but just in case I'm wrong, here's hoping that what happens in Asia stays in Asia! I have a hard enough time finding a decent pair of underwear - I don't want to have to search for overwear, too!

Just how hot is Justine Joli?

Justine Joli
Originally uploaded by morbidthoughts.

Smokin'. Even cuter, sexier, and more adorable in person. Several of us assco-ers saw her at Tristan Taormino's House of Ass party last night. It was a hot and truly ASS-tastic time.

Haiku for the three month sexless relationship

Come on girl, fuck me
I can't wait any longer
Get it over with

assco office party

How did that pre-Valentine's day thingy turn out, I live in Queens and got snowed out, did it turn out okay despite the weather?

Assco Office Party

Party
Originally uploaded by candiedyams.

No awkward moments, just lingerie models and cocktails. See you there!